Reflection #3: Keep Your Priorities Straight

If I close my eyes and try really hard I can still hear the voices of little ones singing
            J - O - Y,  J - O - Y   this is what it means,
           Jesus first, Yourself last , and Others in between

That song would repeat over and over on Sunday mornings when I was in junior high and high school. Those were the first days that I lead kids in worship.  Those were the first days that I thought about what it meant to help people connect with something bigger than themselves - to connect with God.

Now more than 30 years later and 25 years into ministry I realize that this little song had more to teach me than I ever thought possible.  It speaks of priorities that come from deep wisdom.  It speaks about the key to keeping oneself focused and sane in a world that fights to drive you crazy!

So now as I reflect back on the past years of ministry and marriage I offer you these priorities:

1. KEEP GOD FIRST
Believe me.  This is more true than you or I can fully know. If God is not first than nothing else will ever truly be right.  I could write entire books about this; in fact many have for good reason.  God is the beginning .  He is the reason we have a life and the ability to set or neglect priorities in the first place.  For that alone (and many other reasons) the first place in our lives belongs rightfully to Him only.

2.YOUR SPOUSE IS NEXT
After God comes my wife.  This is God's plan that the two will become one and stand together to show the world an example of what love and relationship should be. A wise man once said to me, "The best thing you can do for your kids is to love their mother."  I believe that advice has served me well, but I will amend it a bit.  The most important thing is to show my kids how and why I love God.  Out of that flows a deep desire to be everything I can in love and support to my wife.  The first feeds the second and both make me strong.

3. THE CHILDREN ARE NEXT
My kids need to know that they are valued and important, but not more important than my first two loves: God and their Mother.  I love my kids dearly.  I am crazy, over the top, proud of who they are.  However, no matter how great and important they are to me, I want them to know that they are a gift to me from God. Because of this I love God even more than before they were around.  I also want them to know that as Tami and I work and pray hard to give them the best life and love we have to offer, we fall deeper in love with each other watching them grow.  I see in my kids the best of the things that made me fall in love with their Mom.  The time will come when they will grow out of our house and move on, but Tami and I will never leave each other.  Keeping this in mind reminds us that as much as we love our kids, our love for each other must be nurtured and kept alive first.

4. WORK IS THE SERVANT OF THE TOP THREE
In the right priority, our vocation is the servant of everything else in our lives.  By using our gifts and abilities, we honor God. By working hard and making a living we clothe, care for, and protect our family - securing the future of our spouse and kids - as much as we are capable.  Your job should not take over your life as much as support it.  For me this is ministry.  The focus is my church.  Many times I have felt the pull to put the church,  a person in need, or my career goals - yes ministers have them too - ahead of the needs of my family.  One of the greatest traps we face in America is the temptation to want to give our family so much more than they need.  We want the big house and the nice cars and the good vacations -  often to the point that we will trade simple quiet moments or good times at home for long hours at work. This is supposed to give us all we want.  The sad reality is that time can slip away and the work has become the only life we have.  The family has been lost in the meantime - regardless of the best intentions.  Good priorities tell us that the kids need fewer ipods and game systems and more time at home with Dad.  The family may just need fewer big expensive vacations and more quiet evenings or Saturday mornings at home.


There are many other priorities I could share  but this is a blog, not a book.  and you have probably gotten bored and gone back to Facebook by now anyway. :-)

If not, take a little time to connect with God right now.  Ask him to help you search your priorities and keep them straight.